Cat Fist Fury All the characters depicted here belong to their respective creators. I'm just using them to write a story! Chapter Eight Amazon Antics Cojiro, formally Ranma Saotome, calmly walked toward the gates of Himoto High. It had been a whole day since his little romp through Tokyo in his tiger form. Since that little incident, he had been very careful not to draw attention to himself. It had been relatively peaceful, aside from a few annoyances. The day before? "COJIRO! COME FORTH AND FACE THE AWESOME MIGHT OF THE BLUE THUNDER OF FURINKAN HIGH! Ranma was a little more than surprised to see Kuno waiting for him at the front entrance of his school. The kendoist was more or less recovered from the pounding he had received from his fellow classmates, although, he still looked very stupid with that toupee. "Aren't you supposed to be in class at your school right now?" Ranma asked as he dropped his books and assumed a stance. "Silence knave! You have incurred the wrath of the great Tatewaki Kuno! This affront must be avenged!" "Oh come on Kuno! I don't have time for this! I beat you fair and square! It's not my fault that you were stupid enough to have signed that contract! By the way, your hair is slipping!" Kuno angrily righted the hairpiece and said, "My skills as a great warrior is unprecedented! Only the lovely Akane Tendo has been able to best me! The thought that a lowly peasant such as you would be able to defeat me is totally absurd! It is clear that you had used dark sorcery on me that day! Only the lowest of the low would resort to such trickery! I shall smite thee and prove to all that I, Tatewaki Kuno is second to none!" The insane kendoist rushed forward with his bokken held high. Ranma sighed as he simply ducked under the blow and readied his 'claws.' "QUICK SWIPE!" The motions of his hand were a mere blur to the crowds who were watching. Ranma calmly walked into the school building. Kuno was left standing with a glazed look on his eyes, his weapon still held over his head. For a long moment, all was silent. Then it happened. The wooden sword fell apart and landed on the pavement in six neat little pieces. Kuno's clothes and hairpiece followed suit, falling down in a pile of shredded cloth and hair. Finally, the insane bokken user fell face first on the ground, his body covered in small slashes and bruises. He landed with a dull thud and moaned as he faded into unconsciousness. As Ranma entered his class, Kai, who was at the moment, busily counting a large wad of yen notes greeted him. "Way to go Cojiro! Took out Kuno in less than a second!" "Not a problem." Ranma shrugged. "So what was that all about?" "Oh, well Kuno lost a lot of respect when you beat him so easily at the tournament. No one is taking him seriously as a fighter any more, and his usual bullying of the other boys doesn't work. I guess he really holds a grudge against you for beating him in one tenth of a second! He's also upset at the fact that everyone at Furinkan has his or her hair back, while he still has that buzz cut! The fights in the morning to date Akane have also stopped!" "Really?" "After they saw what you did to Kuno and their principal, they realized that the whole thing was just plain stupid! The fight Akane so you could date her sounded like something the principal would have made up." "I see. So things have quieted down since then?" "Well, not exactly. There's still the matter of that underwear thief that keeps dropping by every now and then." "Underwear thief?" Kai nodded. "Every now and then, some short pervert would come in and raid the girls' locker room. He'd still any undergarment that wasn't nailed down. Bras, panties, leotards, you name it! No one's been able to catch him since he moves so fast. He also seems to be some kind of great martial artist. He pulls out these fancy techniques and he likes to grope girls whenever he can. He's really annoying the girls at the school!" "A martial artist, eh?" Ranma became thoughtful. "Yep! He claims to be the Master of the Anything Goes School of Martial Arts! Goes by the name of Happosai." "Anything Goes?" "That's right, the same school that Akane is learning. I hear that Happosai is staying at the Tendo Dojo, since Akane's father was one of his former students." "Hmmm? so where is this Tendo Dojo?" "About a few blocks west of Furinkan. You'll find it near the place where Shampoo and Mousse are working at, the Nekohanten." The present? Ranma shook his head. Kuno wasn't the only annoyance he'd encountered. Due to another pest that attacked him after school, he was almost late for his new job. After school, that same day? "Cojiro! I will not allow you to take my Shampoo!" Ranma had long sensed Mousse's approach and dodged the barrage of chains and knives that were hurled his way. The projectiles harmlessly clattered to the pavement to his left as Ranma took a stance. "You again?! What's the big idea?" "Prepare to meet your end at the hands of a Master of Hidden Weapons!" Mousse threw his arms forward and charged at him with two curved swords that just appeared in his hands. Of course, Mousse was severely outmatched. Before he could take a dozen steps, Ranma had already come up to him and reduced his blades to fragments with fast swipes of his 'claws,' which glowed with a blue light. "RIPCLAW SLASH!" Mousse was shocked to see his steel blades cut into pieces within an instant! He didn't even get a chance to recover as Ranma sent a hard, right cross to his chin. The blow sent him flying back twelve feet and he impacted heavily against a concrete wall, causing a large depression to form. Mousse moaned in pain as his body crumpled to the ground. Ranma stood back with his arms folded. "Would you mind telling me what this is all about?" Mousse didn't answer. Ranma then looked closer and noted that his opponent was in no condition to answer for a while. Even though he had pulled his punch, the ponytailed martial artist had hit Mousse hard enough to render him unconscious. With hardly any significant effort, Ranma picked up his fallen opponent and slung him over his shoulder. He then sighed as he ran toward the Cat Caf?. The present? That day? Cologne was very irritated. Mousse had disappeared and the afternoon crowds were coming in. Shampoo was still out making a delivery and the elderly matriarch was left alone to tend to the customers. She fully intended to give Mousse a sound beating the moment he walked through the door. When he did appear however, she realized that the nearsighted martial artist wouldn't feel a thing in his condition. Her expression then brightened and she grinned when she saw who was carrying him. Cologne watched as Ranma moved with sure, steady steps. His footsteps were light and well paced. His movements bespoke of grace and control, yet hinted at enormous strength and ferocity. Most of all, his chi energy was extraordinarily strong and focused. Conclusion: A prime catch! Quickly smothering her expression and taking on a more, friendly attitude, the Elder hopped on her staff to greet her future son-in-law. "Greetings young one! Welcome to the Cat Caf?!" Ranma was a bit surprised to face the source of the huge chi energy that he detected when he neared the establishment. His sixth sense already put him on alert, and his hearing and sense of smell were probing the area for any strange sounds or odors. He stared at the diminutive woman before him for a moment longer before remembering his manners. Noting that he was in a Chinese restaurant, he decided to respond in kind. <"Good day to you. I am here to return something that I think may belong to you."> Ranma gestured to the still unconscious form of Mousse. Cologne looked at Mousse and made a sound of disgust. "No need for you to speak Chinese. I am quite fluent in Japanese. However, I must say that your Mandarin is quite good! In any case, yes, that idiot does work here! You may put him in the second room on your right upstairs." She gestured to a flight of stairs behind her. "Thank you." Ranma nodded as he went up to the second floor. A few minutes later, Ranma returned, minus Mousse's form over his shoulder. Looking down at his watch, he then addressed Cologne. "Well, I'm afraid I must be going now. Thank you and goodbye." Ranma turned to leave. "Just a moment Cojiro!" Ranma stopped as he turned to face Cologne again. "How do you know my name?" Cologne smiled as she replied, "My great-granddaughter has told me about you. I also saw a videotape of you during the tournament." "Oh." "Excuse me, exactly who is your great- granddaughter?" "You know her as Shampoo." "You're her great-grandmother?" "I am. My name is Cologne." "Pleased to meet you. Now if you'll excuse me, I really do need to get going." "If you can spare a few minutes, I wish to ask you a few questions." "Well?" "Please, humor an old woman, won't you?" Ranma looked intensely at the figure before him. Despite her size and advanced age, Ranma was still wary. The chi in her body was even more focused than his was and bespoke of great skill. His senses were confirming what he had already guessed about her. This was someone in which one should be careful not to anger. Cautiously, he sat down at a nearby booth. "Well, all right, but just for a few minutes." Cologne nodded as she took a seat opposite to him. "I must say, your fighting style is very impressive! In all my three hundred years, I have never seen anyone even come close to controlling the Neko Ken on a conscious level!" "You know about the Cat Fist?" Ranma became even more wary. Cologne noted his uneasiness and replied, "You don't get to be my age without knowing about the dreaded Cat Fu! I am also aware of the training! Wrap the trainee in fish sausage and throw him into a pit of starving cats! From what I see of your chi, you have already gone through that process! So tell me, who was the one who trained you in this?" Ranma nodded as his expression darkened. His thoughts of his father were not pleasant ones. "My father was the one who did that to me and I have never forgiven him since that time! He was so intent on making me learn that technique that he failed to read the rest of the training manual!" The Elder nodded. "Yes, I am well aware of the side effects! The trainee's mental state becomes partially unbalanced as he develops a fear of cats! The technique itself becomes submerged into the person's subconscious and only emerges when the fear reaches its peak. When that occurs, anyone within his immediate vicinity becomes endangered as the person is reduced to a feral state! The trainee starts acting like a maddened cat and will attack anything or anyone that he perceives as a threat! Provided of course that he survives the training at all! It is because of this that no one has tried to master this skill for the last fifty years or so! Which brings us to you?" "And your point is?" "You are quite possibly the only person in the world who has truly mastered the Cat Fist without suffering any mental instability! Not only that, but from what I saw on the videotape, you have improved upon it and have now created a new fighting style based on the original technique! You must be a very extraordinary martial artist to have been able to accomplish this!" Ranma got the distinct feeling that Cologne wanted something from him and was trying to keep him at the restaurant. The ponytailed martial artist was feeling like a trapped animal and he didn't like it. Cologne smiled as she sensed someone approaching the building. Shampoo was returning from her deliveries. It was perfect! Shampoo would arrive and give Cojiro the Kiss of Marriage, thereby validating her claim on him! She more than ready to start calling him son-in-law! It was then that she suddenly tensed up as she sensed a large amount of chi energy. Someone else was approaching the Nekohanten. Cologne frowned as she realized who it was. The one person who could ruin her plans! Quickly smothering her displeasure, Cologne smiled and said, "Oh my! It is getting late and I must prepare for the evening crowds! I apologize for detaining you." "Uh? No problem!" Ranma replied. He too had tensed up when his sixth sense alerted him to Mascara's group. With a quick bow, he exited the Cat Caf? and was gone from sight. Ten seconds later, the door opened and Shampoo entered. "Great-grandmother! Shampoo back!" A mere two seconds later, there was a knock at the door and Shampoo went to answer. Her eyes widened as she saw who it was and immediately bowed. <"Greetings Honored Elder Mascara!"> Cologne could only fume in silence at the thought of coming so close to catching such prime husband material for her great- granddaughter. The present? Ranma couldn't think of any reason as to why the old woman had wanted him to stay that day, but he was relieved to have escaped. However, he was still a bit confused. He had no idea just who had arrived at the Cat Caf? after he had left, but the chi energy signatures were very familiar. Sighing to himself, he continued on his way. At Himoto High, another scene of great importance was taking place. Kai was busy selling information to a group of very interested females. "And you say that this Cojiro is the school's greatest fighter?" "You bet!" Kai replied as he regarded the diminutive woman before him. She reminded the hustler of the old woman he had seen at the Cat Caf?. In fact, aside from the blue robes she wore and her hair tied up in an elaborate braid, she would have been mistaken as Cologne's twin sister. "In any case, Cojiro beat every one of his opponents at No Holds Barred Tournament and won our school's first victory in a long time! I still have several copies of his fights on tape if you're interested! Better hurry though, these won't last! Ten thousand yen!" Mascara nodded. "Thank you but no. We have heard tales of this person ever since we came to Tokyo. We would like to meet with him and see if he is really all that you say he is." "Oh he's all that and a lot more, I guarantee it!" Ranma was a bit on edge when he had neared the school grounds. His danger sense began to give off a slight warning sensation and he started sensing familiar chi energies. When he looked up, he saw something that made him halt in his tracks. Ranma's mind went back to a year ago, a few weeks after he had received his altered form. He recognized all the young girls who were with Mascara. He was quite familiar with each of them, as they were part of the groups who had been hunting him for a trophy! Conditioner had long blond hair that was done up into two ponytails and green eyes. Her build was slender and athletic. She wore a bright blue tunic and matching silk pants with sandals. Her waist had a red sash wrapped around it. Her face was heart shaped and she was downright cute! She carried a Chinese broadsword on her back and had a serious look on her face. Bubbles had long red hair and her eyes were blue. Her figure was somewhat more voluptuous than Conditioner's, with her chest fuller and her hips more curved. She wore an outfit that was similar to Conditioner's, but it was colored black. She also sported a pair of shoulder guards and carried a spear. Brush and Comb were near-identical twins. They were about an inch shorter than Bubbles and each wore a short, white, silk dress that barely cleared their hips, and red sandals. They had slender bodies and seemed to be about a year younger than Ranma. The only ways to tell them apart were from their hair color and the weapons they carried. Brush had black hair while her sibling was ash blonde. Brush had on a bandoleer of throwing daggers and shurikens, while her sister carried a bow and a quiver of arrows. Each sister also had a large knife strapped to her right thigh. Ranma's memories of these female warriors were not pleasant ones. Conditioner had tried to catch him several times with ingenious traps. One time, he had almost fallen into a covered pit lined with stakes! Bubbles was no better as she had made many attempts to have his head displayed on the business end of her spear. His noggin had been used for target practice by Brush's throwing weapons and he had been introduced to the fastest archer in China before. Comb was very capable of launching a hundred arrows in rapid succession like a machine gun! She was deadly accurate and could pick off a gnat from three hundred meters! Fortunately for Ranma, his tiger form was tough enough to withstand arrows. Then again, who knew what surprises the archer had in store for him since their last encounter. Ranma backed up against the wall and began to take deep calming breaths, taught to him by some Shaolin priests during his travels through China. When he had reached a level of serenity, he carefully peeked around the corner and watched. His friend Kai was negotiating something with an extremely aged woman that reminded him of Cologne. After a few minutes, the Amazons bid him goodbye and then left the schoolyards via leaping over the wall. The Neko Ken fighter let off a sigh of relief and continued his walk to his first class. Sometime later, Ranma was busy practicing with his friend Shang in the gymnasium. He agreed to help the Chinese boy with improving his Kung Fu skills. As they sparred, the two engaged in conversation. "Hey Shang! You're getting better!" Ranma dodged the punch and countered with a leg sweep. "Thank you! I train harder since tournament!" Shang leaped over the sweep and tried a high kick. "Of course, I still not as good as you! You even beat Akane Tendo!" Ranma dodged the kick and said, "Well, to tell you truth, she's not as good as people say she is. In fact, I would say that she's only a little better than the boys she fought every morning." "You think beating up forty boys every day isn't good?" "Not really. I could do that in my sleep. Besides, the boys she fought against had very little or no skill at all in the martial arts. They were more or less a bunch of brawlers. I saw one of Kai's videotapes of her morning fights and I'm not really impressed." "You not?" "Nope. She may study the Anything Goes Martial Arts, but she's nowhere near as good as she thinks she is." "What you mean? She supposed to be best in Nerima." "Her skills are highly overrated. She thinks she's the best because she's never gone up against a better opponent. From what I saw at the tournament, she had the least amount of skill of her team. They all had far better ability." "You sure? I mean, she beat up Kuno every day." "That's because he doesn't go full out against her. I saw the videotape and noticed a lot of openings that he could have used to take advantage of her. Kai tells me that Kuno doesn't want to hurt 'his love.' If you ask me, he should give her a couple of good whacks to knock her back down to Earth!" "But the stories?" "Are just stories Shang. I've learned from my trip through China that you should never take anything at face value or believe everything that you hear. Shampoo, Mousse, Ryoga, Ukyo and Kuno are all better than she is. It's just that they've haven't challenged Akane to a match. I've had Kai do a little research about them and I found out that Ryoga doesn't want to go against her because he doesn't want to hurt her, same as Kuno. Shampoo and Mousse are on a special visa and fighting against fellow students is frowned on. Ukyo didn't have anything against Akane. Since they all never had to prove that they were better than she is, Akane just assumed that she was the best. After meeting with her yesterday, I found out that she was nothing more than a self- centered, spoiled brat who just couldn't face up to the truth that someone was better than she was. Heck, she didn't even say thank you when I gave her that hair tonic!" "So Akane isn't the best?" "Not by a long shot! I think that even you could beat her!" "Really?" Shang's confidence began to rise. "Sure! I'm willing to bet that if you trained enough, you could become better than her with no problem! I'll help you train if you like." "Thanks!" Shang launched a spin kick. "By the way," Ranma blocked the kick. "I need to ask you a few things about the Joketsuzoku you told me about before." "What you want to know?" Shang found himself forced back by Ranma's triple strike combination. "I've been having some problems with them lately. I got attacked by Mousse yesterday and I met up with Shampoo's great- grandmother." Shang suddenly stopped and took a neutral stance. Ranma saw this and also stopped. The Kung Fu fighter looked at his friend with surprise. "You meet up with Cologne?" "You know her?" "Yes. I go to Nekohanten many times for dinner. She is very strong fighter! She trained Shampoo. But why Mousse attack you? You no after Shampoo, so he no have reason to hate you." Ranma nodded. "That's what I thought! Just after school, he came out of nowhere and tried to cut me to pieces! He accused me of trying to steal his Shampoo. I don't get it! I mean, I'd understand if he was mad at me for beating him at the tournament, but I have absolutely no interest in Shampoo." "That very strange." "When I knocked him out, I couldn't just leave him lying on the street, so I had to carry him back to the Cat Caf?. That was when I met up with Cologne. Let me tell you, she gave me an industrial case of the willies!" "What you mean?" "She knew about the Neko Ken and how the original technique was done. She? I don't know, but she acted like she wanted something from me. Then today, a group of Amazons came to the school this morning, asking about me." "How you know they Amazons?" "They came to Kai for the information and he told me about them during lunch. Now what I want to know is, just what do they want from me?" "Shang not sure. Very little known about Joketsuzoku. Only reason Shang knows about them is because he have very distant cousin who is Amazon. Never met with Cousin Gel, but she once send him Book of Amazon Tribal Law, just in case Shang ever decide to visit her in village. Not looked at it yet! I get you book if you like." "Thanks." Ranma and Shang then continued on with their sparring. Another day had passed. To Ranma's displeasure, Kuno had shown up again to challenge him. The resulting fight lasted one second, and the Blue Thunder ended up eating dirt. His clothes were only good for cleaning rags and his bokken had been reduced to toothpicks. Mousse had also shown up to attack him. He once again shouted out, "I will not allow you to take my Shampoo!" One Tiger Claw Frenzy later and Mousse's weapons and body were shredded like newspaper. At the moment, Ranma was walking home with his head in a book. Shang had let him borrow his copy of the Amazon Book of Tribal Law. It wasn't until he started reading the third chapter that he began to have a sinking feeling. Ranma never got to finish the sentence as his danger sense suddenly alerted him of something coming right at him. Ranma dropped the book, ducked his head, and rolled to his right. He looked up and his eyes widened as he saw ten arrows imbedded in a tree that he had been standing in front of a moment before. Looking in the direction of where the arrows had been fired from, he saw Combwas standing on a nearby roof top and was preparing to loose another volley. It was then that Ranma's sixth sense warned him of something else. He leaned back, just as twenty throwing stars streaked past, missing his chest by inches. The sharp projectiles imbedded themselves into the wall of a store. Ranma didn't know why he was suddenly being attacked, but now was not the time to think about it. Brush suddenly appeared twenty feet behind him and let loose a flight of throwing daggers. Ranma's hands blurred into action. "TIGER CLAW FRENZY!" Each of the knives was successfully deflected as Ranma used his 'claws' to knock them away by striking their handles. Brush's eyes widened as Ranma moved fast enough to make the Chestnut Fist look like slow motion. She readied another volley, just as Ranma closed the distance between them and dived forward. He made a roll, then used a handspring to launch himself up and over her. It was at that time that Comb let off another flight of arrows. At the same time, Brush threw a dozen shurikens. Ranma moved with enough speed to dodge the two attacks, and the projectiles missed each other by millimeters. Comb and Brush screamed, as they each became a target for her sister's weapons. Comb was driven back and found herself pinned to a billboard. Brush found herself stuck to another tree by her sister's arrows! Ranma landed in a fighting stance and had his senses on alert. Although Brush and Comb were incapacitated for the moment, he could still feel that he was still in danger. His feelings were confirmed when Conditioner and Bubbles suddenly charged at him from the shadows of a nearby alley. "Whoa!" Ranma barely managed to dodge the combined thrusts of the sword and spear. Leaping back to get more fighting room, he took on a ready stance. He noted that his assailants were also taking on battle stances. "Who are you? Why are you attacking me?" Conditioner smiled as she answered, "We are best fighters of the Joketsuzoku and we come here to challenge you!" "Challenge me? But?" Ranma never got to finish as Bubbles charged forward with her spear. Ranma sidestepped and retaliated. "QUICK SWIPE!" Bubbles eyes widened as she saw her weapon get cut to pieces. Before she knew it, Ranma grabbed her arm and used her forward momentum to catapult her into a mailbox. Her head slammed into the metal with a dull clang and she slid down to the pavement. Conditioner thought this was an excellent opportunity to attack and slashed at Ranma with her sword. Ranma already knew she was coming and leapt over her attack. While still in the air, he jabbed forward and hit several pressure points on the Amazon's arms, causing her to drop her weapon. With a twist, he lashed out with a foot and kicked her in the head. Now ordinarily, Ranma is usually hesitant about hitting girls, but his life was in danger at the moment and these girls were playing for keeps. As Conditioner was sent sprawling, Ranma landed and picked up her sword, then whirled about, bringing up the weapon to deflect a combined barrage of arrows and shurikens. Comb and Brush had freed themselves and had gotten to the place where Ranma was engaging Conditioner and Bubbles. It was only thanks to his sixth sense and enhanced reflexes that saved Ranma from being turned into a pincushion. Bubbles moaned as she regained consciousness. Seeing that Ranma was now facing off against the twins, Reaching into he sash, she pulled out a small cylinder that was about eight inches long and about an inch and a half diameter. Pressing a small switch on the side, the device telescoped into a staff that was six feet long and at one end a spear point popped out. She then got up and took a position behind Ranma. On the roof of a nearby building, two figures were watching the battle with interest. Cologne and Mascara each looked at Ranma and assessed his fighting skills. "Very impressive! I can see why you did not tell me about this one, Cologne." "Yes, Cojiro is indeed a prime catch!" Cologne agreed. "However, since he defeated Shampoo first, I would like to exercise her rights to be the one to give him the Kiss of Marriage!" "You are forgetting yourself Cologne!" Mascara countered. "Just because Shampoo has already been defeated by this one, that does not make him her husband! She has yet to give him the kiss! Right now, he is still fair game to any of the others!" "Cojiro WILL be my son-in-law!" Cologne affirmed. "Shampoo will be here shortly to rectify that little oversight!" She was a bit irritated that Mascara had found out about Ranma and had sent her group after him. Her plans to induct Ranma into the tribe hinged on Shampoo getting him. Ranma was too good a prize to miss! However, Mascara was her rival and would love to upstage her. "We shall see." Mascara said as she turned her gaze back tom the battle. Seeing that this was no ordinary foe they were up against, Comb decided to up the ante. Raising her bow, she notched an arrow and began concentrating. The arrow began glowing with a weird red light and Ranma braced himself. "DRAGON FIRE ARROW!" The fiery projectile was launched and screamed toward him like miniature comet. Ranma ducked and evaded it. The arrow whizzed by and struck an empty store. It crashed through the front window, and an instant later, the front part of the empty building exploded. The blast took out the front wall and looked as if a gas main had blown up. Ranma's eyes widened as he saw the destruction caused by a single, chi-powered arrow. He didn't have time however to think about it as his sixth sense then screamed in alert. "SHOOTING STARS!" The Neko Ken fighter turned to see Brush hurl two dozen throwing stars that glowed with a blue light. After seeing what one chi-powered arrow could do, Ranma was not eager to see what this new attack would do to him. Raising his sword to deflect the incoming missiles, the ponytailed martial artist was quite shocked when the stars suddenly emitted energy beams. The blasts began to fire out like laser beams as the throwing stars spun. Small potholes were rendered into the pavement as Ranma dodged each beam. He dropped the sword in order to get more maneuverability. After the last of the stars flew by, Ranma looked behind him and saw Conditioner pick up her sword. The four Amazons surrounded the Neko Ken fighter, then charged forward at the same time. The warrior women began throwing punches, kicks stabs and slashes. Ranma dodged each one of their attacks. The Amazons were astounded by the incredible display of skill and speed. Not one of them could get a good solid hit on him. Ranma had just about enough of being attacked for no reason. Ranma began to power up his battle aura. The four Amazons saw the build up in power and then stopped in their attacks. They quickly put some distance between themselves and their target, just as Ranma exploded into action. Ranma let off a monstrous roar and attacked. Conditioner was first to fall as Ranma's hands glowed with a blue light. With a single swipe, he reduced her sword into metal fragments, then followed through with a fast four hit combination. The blonde groaned as she was hit in the abdomen and then was rendered unconscious as Ranma hit a pressure point on the back of her neck. Bubbles wasn't sure how it happened, but she suddenly found herself being hit over her head with the butt of her own spear. She went down like a bag of cement. Ranma then pivoted on one foot and threw the spear at Comb. The archer swerved to dodge then realized too late that the spear was a diversion. Ranma leapt up and delivered a sidekick, which plowed into her midsection. Comb was sent flying backward. Her head then smacked into a street sign and she slid down. Brush threw another barrage of energized throwing stars, but Ranma was ready for them. Cupping his hands before him, he focused his chi and fired. "RAGING TIGER BOLT!" The blast of chi energy raced toward Brush, just as her throwing stars began shooting off their energy beams. Ranma dodged each of the beams as his own attack struck Brush in the chest, sending her down to the pavement. Ranma then rushed forward and used the sleeper pressure point to knock out his last opponent. It was then that he sensed the approach of someone else. Turning around, he saw a purple blur darting toward him. Ranma stood at the ready when the figure landed. His expression showed surprise as he saw who it was. "Shampoo?" "Hello Airen!" She smiled as she began walking toward him. "Airen?" Ranma's eyes became the size of dinner plates as he recognized what the word meant. "Why are you calling me husband? What's going on?" "You are Shampoo's Airen!" Shampoo leapt forward, intending to use the momentary distraction to glomp onto him and give him the Kiss of Marriage. Ranma however, was still too fast for her. Even though his brain was still trying to figure out what was happening, his body reacted on automatic. Seeing Shampoo's sudden advance as an attack, he leapt high and cleared a height of thirty feet. The purple- haired Amazon found herself clutching air. She looked up and saw the Ranma was now perched on a street lamp. "Why you run away Airen?" Ranma became very nervous at the day's events and said, "Will someone tell me just what the hell is going on?! And will you stop calling me?" "Cojiro! I will not let you have Shampoo!" Ranma leapt off the post, just as a huge barrage of chains with blades attached sliced though his perch. Ranma managed a double flip and landed on his feet. He then turned to his new assailant. Mousse was standing before him with rage in his eyes. Shampoo stopped short and became very annoyed at the sudden appearance of her unwanted suitor. "Aiya! What stupid Mousse doing here?! Go away!" "I will not let you have her Cojiro!" Mousse snarled as he charged toward him with a bladed staff that he made appear out of the sleeves of his robe. Ranma braced himself for another confrontation, when Shampoo suddenly appeared in front of him, then delivered a hard uppercut to Mousse's chin. The myopic magician went flying. Ranma was so startled to see Shampoo come to his defense, that he dropped his guard for a microsecond. That was all Shampoo needed to turn around and grab onto him in a mega- glomp that strained even his iron ribs. Shampoo smiled as she looked adoringly into his eyes and leaned forward. She closed her eyes and? WHAM!!! Shampoo received a hard blow to the cheek and was sent sprawling, releasing her hold on Ranma. The Neko Ken fighter turned and saw that Conditioner had regained consciousness and was smiling at him, while rubbing her fist. She then reached up and framed his face with her hands. She then stood on her tiptoes and brought his head down toward her lips? "Oh my darling Shampoo!" "Erk!" Ranma stood dumfounded as Mousse grabbed Conditioner from behind. The Amazon was clearly miffed that the near-sighted martial artist had once again grabbed the wrong person. Mousse had lost his glasses after Shampoo had knocked him away and assumed that the girl near Ranma was his beloved. Conditioner turned herself in Mousse's arms and pushed him away while shouting, "I NOT SHAMPOO!" She then emphasized her remark by a savage kick to Mousse's groin. "YEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOWWWWW!" Ranma scratched his head in confusion. Just what was going on? Before he had time to consider anything else, something knocked into him from behind, driving him to the pavement. Silently cursing himself for being caught flatfooted, he looked over his shoulder and saw that Brush and Comb had rejoined the fight. Comb smiled as she leaned over and said in a husky voice, "Now you come home with Comb, yes? But first, is proper for wife to give handsome and strong husband Kiss of?" "Hey! Why you give him kiss and not Brush?!" Comb's sister said angrily. "He belong to me!" "What you mean? He is Comb's Airen! No talk back to older sister!" "What you mean you older?! I older than you!" "No you not!" "Yes I am!" "Not!" "Am!" The twins began a heated argument and it wasn't long before blows were being traded. The two brawling siblings rolled off Ranma as he stood up and stared in amazement. A few minutes ago, these Amazons were trying to kill him! Now they were trying to marry him? Shampoo shook her head to clear it. Conditioner knew how to hit. When she looked up and saw that her rivals were busy at the moment, she took advantage of the situation and rushed toward Ranma. However, she fell flat on her face when something grabbed her right ankle. She looked down and saw a battered and bruised Mousse clutching at her foot. "S-Sh-Shampoo!" Mousse moaned. The Amazon got up, hauled out one of her war maces and swung. CLANG!!! Conditioner was feeling proud of herself after pounding Mousse. She then saw the object of her affection standing near where the twins were brawling. She decided not look a gift horse in the mouth and rushed to claim her prize. However, just as she got within ten feet of Ranma, she heard a sickening voice. "SHAMPOO!" Conditioner turned and saw Mousse's body head toward her like a missile. The near-sighted Hidden Weapons master collided with her and the two of them became sprawled on the pavement. Shampoo dusted herself off and smiled sweetly at the two. "Conditioner can have stupid Mousse! Shampoo get Cojiro!" This was not to be however as she turned to face her intended. She instead found herself facing Bubbles, who had finally recovered. The red haired girl glared at Shampoo and said, "I no let you take Airen without fight!" "What you talking? Cojiro belong to Shampoo!" In less than a second, the two were engaged in a fight that was similar to Brush and Comb's. The fights became engulfed into clouds of dust, which eventually began moving toward each other. In less than a minute, the two brawls combined into one big free- for-all. Ranma stared in disbelief at the entire spectacle and decided that he had enough of this madness. He began walking away from the scene, stopping only to pick up the book he had dropped when thewhole mess started. However, just as he was about to get out of sight, two figures dropped to the street in front of him and blocked his way. "And just where do you think you're going?" Mascara said as she put forth her staff. "That's right sonny boy. You can't just walk away from this." Cologne duplicated her rival's stance and waited. Ranma recognized Cologne. "I don't see what this has to do with me." Ranma took a stance and gestured to the fight behind him. "They're too busy fighting each other and I really don't have time for this!" "No son-in-law, you are going to remain here until Shampoo or one of the others gives you the Kiss of Marriage!" Cologne said in an even tone. "Son-in-law? Kiss of Marriage? What are you??" It was then that Ranma recalled the Kiss of Death Law. "Wait a minute! I just read about the Kiss of Death Law and I know what would happen if an Amazon is defeated by a female outsider. Are you saying that the Kiss of Marriage means??" Cologne nodded. "That's right son-in-law! If a male outsider defeats an Amazon, then she must make him her husband with the Kiss of Marriage! Shampoo would have succeeded had Mousse and the others had not interfered!" "So? what you're saying is that if none of them gives me the Kiss of Marriage, then it's not really official, now is it?" Ranma tensed up as he prepared to attack. Mascara and Cologne reluctantly nodded as they also tensed up. "Well then, I have no choice." Ranma began powering up his battle aura again and the two elders braced themselves. Just as the two put forth their canes in a stabbing motion toward his chest, Ranma let loose his technique. "FINAL ATTACK! RUN AWAY!!!" Before the startled eyes of Cologne and Mascara, Ranma made an about-face and then ran off into the distance, leaving a huge trail of dust behind him. With Ranma's enhanced strength, stamina and speed, he was out of sight in less than a nanosecond. The two matriarches were still staring in disbelief with their canes extended as the fights between the Amazons began to die down. Ranma was breathing heavily as he walked into the coffee shop where he worked. His new boss, a kindly old man by the name of Korin Sato, greeted him. "Hello Cojiro! Good to see that you made it on time!" He then noticed Ranma breathing hard. "What's the matter Cojiro? You look so tired." Ranma waved it off as he took a seat to catch his breath. "It's nothing that you need to be worried about. It's a personal problem of mine. I'm just having some difficulties with a few people right now." "Oh? So what kind of problems?" The old man then smiled knowingly as he thought about the trials that all teenagers went through. "Money problems? Zits? School? Girl problems?" Ranma's head snapped up at that last statement. He was silent for a long time before giving his boss a rueful smile. "You could say that I'm having some girl problems." To be continued? Author's Notes This rewrite was mainly to show that Ranma does not have to eventually fall in love with Akane. Akane lovers may argue that they are destined to be together, but I really don't agree. The Ranma in the original series had to endure Akane's abuses and save her countless times. Akane has not given as much as Ranma has. The added dialogue between Ranma and Shang was inspired from the Mirrors Multiplied series in which Ranma does point out that Akane was self-centered. She believed that she could master any skill, just because she thought she could. Hence her atrocious cooking, her inept sewing and her other domestic skills. She doesn't realize the steps needed to become a master and she really can't accept the truth, so she just vents her anger on the nearest object. What she cannot master or fit into her own world, she just pummels into the ground or just ignores it. In my Dual Destinies story, I have given Akane more leeway, but my other stories will reflect how I think Ranma would interpret her. Just remember that he is no longer being pressured by his father or Soun to marry her. He is not living with the Tendos. He is totally on his own and therefore will follow his own instincts.